Finding · myself · by · accident

I would choose anything with the name of the brand printed across it in big bold letters that let everyone know where you shop and that just by wearing your clothes that you are exploiting people in the third world who work in sweatshops. I would also like a ban on non-fair trade items made around the world so that we all may earn a living wage (and look fantastic doing it!)
*this is said while wearing a cotton tee probably made in a sweatshop /cries

Okay, so our baby shower is two and a half days away. I'm just wondering how many handmade blankies we are going to end up with . . . so far we've recieved One giant gift and off of our lists people have bought: 1 gift pack of playtex bottles, 1 3pk of Gerber onesies, the stroller/carseat system that we've already recieved, somebody got the nice diaper bag from thinkgeek and a onesie from there as well. that's it . . . wtf?! I know one person is bringing over a truck load of handmedowns (we're paying for the u-haul rental and gas so they can even be here) and I KNOW one person has hand knit a lot of cute toys and another baby blanket of doom . . . and a third (I don't even know if they're coming to the shower or not) is in the process of making another baby blanket. but seriously, we need more than just blankies! I mean, if we get more blankies than we can ever use (like all baby size blankies and what-not) would anyone be offended if we donate some to the local chapter of Project Linus? I'm just worried that we won't recieve other stuff that we really need starting out . . . like diapers? and a breastfeeding pillow? and ooooh! how about a crib mattress?!
and another thing, what is up with people asking about my latest ultrasound print outs? I've been healthy, the baby has been healthy, so I've only had one. Why does it seem like everyone else I know who's been pregnant recently (or still is) has gotten at least one every two months or more? I can understand the ladies with twins or other high risk, high complication pregnancies, but damn! It just seems like there is an awful lot of expensive diagnostic testing going on here. But then again some of these tests are done on medicare/medicate/state medical aid, so I guess some doctors are all like "well, you're not paying for it, so let's have this expensive test done as much as I can justify it".
Seriously, I'm not bitter, just pissed off that people keep asking me to see new pictures and then look at me like I'm a weirdo for only having ONE mid-term ultrasound done that my OB and I had to fudge a little to get my insurance to pay for.
So the same people who have been asking to see my ultrasound pictures repeatedly, please fuck off and leave me alone and stop asking obnoxious questions. And just because we say "we think he's a boy" does not mean that we don't want to find out, it just means that we did NOT go to a OTC ultrasound place just to find out the gender. Boogie kept his knees together for the one diagnostic that we've had and we're okay with that! You know, they still haven't proved that multiple non-medically necessary ultrasounds are completely safe . . .

So this evening, I'm going in to lick the tasty soap scum off of the tub after mom and dad get out.  Like I usually do.  Now I'm normally a cute, well behaved little cat who spends his days looking out the front window.
 
Anyway, where was I.  Oh yeah, so to get over the edge of the tub, I have to go at it at a run.  So I run, I jump, I'm soaked.  Mom had left the water in the tub.  Somthing about keeping the house better humidified, I think she said to Dad.  Whatever.  I jump out, making a huge thumping sound, the water is sloshing everywhere, but I'm in the living room.  Mom and Dad are mystified as to what I may have knocked over in the bathroom, so Mom goes to see.  Then she sees a trail and the water still sloshing back and forth like a wave machine and starts laughing!  Can you believe she laughed at me?  Meanwhile I'm trying desperately to dry myself off.  Then she grabs a towel and chases me under a chair with it.  I just wanted to show how grown up I am by drying myself off alone.  Then Dad grabs me, wraps me up in a towel and tells Mom to take a picture! 
 I am so not happy, can you tell?  Then they have the audacity to continue to use the towel to dry me off.  I try to tell them I can do it by my self, but they just would not take no for an answer.  Dad was nice enough to hold me by the scruff like my cat mom would have done when I was a baby and they used to do at the shelter.  That was nice of him.  Once I was dry enough, Mom let me go.  I just wanted to let everybody know just how mean my human parents are.  
I'm off to go lick my toes in some semblance of dignity.
Oberon

this fic was inspired by  this picture by my friend cameron.  below is the fruits of my demented mind.  why i like torturing poor severus, i have no idea.  it's just fun.  :-) at least i torture my own characers just as much.

So I got one of those scrubbing bubbles automatic shower cleaners. And I now have a 6' tall 5 year old who wants to push the blue button and watch it work. He's gotten sprayed in the face twice in the past ten minutes because he was trying to see how it works. The second time he was standing on the toilet looking over the shower curtain. It is very entertaining to watch the man in your life turn into a little kid just because you bought a machine with one big blue button that sprays stuff. Aaaaah technology....

so we've officially registered at Target and Sears. Target for homey stuff, kitchen gadgets (inexpensive ones), camping and gaming stuff. yay. Sears was specifically for tools. YAY!!!! just as long as the male members of my family don't do something chauvenistic and get tools for jason and not me to use. then it's on! them are my tools!!!! i tagged a hammer specifically for grommeting stuff. yay.